When Harry Met Fatty

Fatty turns Fifty and its fantastic, wrapped in plastic!  This week we review 1987's Mannequin, (starring Andrew McCarthy and Kim Catrall and Estelle Getty), a romantic comedy that explores man's ultimate PIMPelicious ideal of a relationship:  Andy McCarthy is a true artist and navel gazing biscuit brain.  He crafts a mannequin that gets possessed by the spirit of an Egyptian princess who died 4,000 years ago.  The only catch is, the mannequin is real only when they are alone. Their love can only exist when no one else is looking. Pretty soon, department store politics come between them and they must decide: will Andy trade his heart for a dame called reality?  A reality that is porous and extremely biodigradable?  Or will he throw caution to the wind and rescue that oversized barbie doll from the world's largest Mannequin shredder? In the words of Eighties rock band Starship, 

"And we can build this dream together standing strong forever nothing's gonna stop us now". 

Dave reveals what 50 shades of Rom Com have done to him.  Noah simply says "you again!". 

Diane Lane is DYING to take the fast lane to Johnny's heart!  Must Love Dogs starring Diane Lane and John Cusack is the paw that breaks David and Noah's back in our final fatty four part series of THE DOG DAYS OF SUMMER!  

Diane Lane is a forty-something woman who's former husband got the goldmine while she got the shaft!  Her overbearing sister creates a personal ad for her with an imperative that her suitors MUST LOVE DOGS. And while every dog must have its day, Diane finds an easy lay from a sexy dad, (Dermot Mulroney) and an eccentric boat maker (John Cusack).  Who will be the first to bury their bone in this broad's backyard? Tune in and find out! 

Noah retells some URBANE legends and Dave acquaints us with his first best friend Prancer.  Fly Pepper, Fly! 

When it comes to dating in this park, you better watch your step!  Dog Park starring Luke Wilson, Janeane Garofalo, some dudes from the sketch show Kids in the Hall and Natasha Henstridge, that blonde chick from the Species movie. They say a dog is a man’s best friend, until his girlfriend puts an end to it!  Luke Wilson is sharing joint custody of his dog Mogli with his ex-girlfriend who’s getting it on with the punk rocker who used to date the chick from Species who is now seducing Luke, but he can’t date her because he did a bachelor auction and got sold to this crazy broad who likes to love him ninja-style nonstop!  And every person who is in this picture is taking obedience classes from a mysterious dog psychologist who insists that everything must be perfect come Doggy Graduation. When it comes to matters of the heart, don’t say heel, just say HEAL. 

Noah finally understands why men take pilgrimages to the Champagne Room and Dave pray tells of his stinky-finger days of high school yore.

Grody and Goldy are chasing one helluva Chevy!  Seems Like Old Times starring Chevy Chase, Goldie Hawn, Charles Grodin and Benson the beloved butler by day, managing editor by sports night!  This 1980’s Neil Simon comedy is basically The Fugitive trapped inside a pet store that has yet to be hit by John Larroquette in his blind-date-mobile.  Chevy Chase is a writer who gets kidnapped by two thugs who force him to rob a bank.  He Richard Kimbles his way to Goldie Hawn, his ex-wife who is a lawyer now married to California’s next Attorney General, Charles Grodin.  Goldie likes to take in strays from her neighborhood as well as strays from the justice system, which consist of all her defendants she is putting to work in her household.  Will Chevy be the stray that breaks this couple’s back?  When Harry Met Fatty’s DOG DAYS OF SUMMER is half over, why are you watching the olympics? God Phelps those who help themselves!  

Dave remembers a gal who was attacked by the hound of Lake Crystal and Noah attempts to find out if Dave is a skinwalker.  

The Truth is...only Gov. Jesse Ventura really knows. Welcome to When Harry Met Fatty’s first multi-episode special The Dog Days of Summer, where we devote all of August to rom coms that feature man’s best friend. Our first installment is 1996’s The Truth About Cats and Dogs where we witness how low Janeane Garofalo can go.  She’s the Rush Limbaugh of Veterinarian radio hosts who lives next door to Uma Thurman, a model / actress.  When a handsome listener pays a visit to the radio station, he mistakes Uma for Janeane and asks her out. The rest of the movie is spent inanely trying to whiten one of the whitest lies of all: Does this Cyrano De Bergerac routine make me look fat?!?

Dave suffers Noah’s revisionist re-enactment of his former days as a cruise ship employee and we wet our dog whistles with a salty dog.