When Harry Met Fatty (general)

Dave and Noah say goodbye and Good Luck Chuck! This film stars Dane Cook, Jessica Alba and your worst migraine!

At the age of ten, Dane Cook gets cursed by a Goth girl at a party, forcing him to live a life of always being the "one" right before any woman finds her ONE. After meeting Jessica Alba he decides he can't lose her to the next guy.  There are lots of boobs in this.

Dave and Noah take a walk down Fatty lane.  Come join us for this extendo episode! Thanks for listening!

This week Dave and Noah put down their food diaries and pick up The Nanny Diaries, starring Scarlett Johansson, Laura Linney, Paul Giamatti, Captain America and the ebony of all ivory: Alicia Keys!

How far will Scarly Jo go to find herself this summer? Having just graduated with a degree in Anthropology, she randomly gets offered a job to be a nanny for Laura Linney's Upper East Side Strife.  Minding a precocious brat whose parents alternate between being perpetually bitchy or lecherously horny to her, Scarly Jo soon catches the eye of Chris Evans, a Harvard Hottie who lives in the same building. Can his honky-but hunky love lift her up where she belongs? Only her Ethnic Best Friend Alicia holds the Keys to that quandary.

There once was a Nanny named Dave, who minded a cruiseship of knaves....Noah becomes your ethnic best friend.  

Dave and Noah get "spirit-fingered" by this week's romantic comedy Fired Up! Starring Nicholas D'Agosto, Eric Christian Olsen and Sarah Roemer.

Eric and Nicholas are two high school football jocks who con their way into Cheerleader Camp for the girls, for the glory and for the gonorrhea!

Dave has eaten his cheerios and is filled with the spirit of the mighty pom-pom while Noah quizes him on his knowledge of Cheer history.  

NO STRINGS ATTACHED, along with your retinas, after you see this piece of Rom Com! Dave and Noah delve into the Ashtray of Ashton Kutcher to retrieve the second "friends with benefits" movie of 2011. Ashton Kutcher is the son of a popular TV legend who has a habit of screwing the Kutch-dog's former girlfriends.  Ashton starts humping the nearest nurse who will take pity on him, namely Natalie Portman, who's taking a break from a life of Tom Cruise Control and Queen Padme Star Wars duties. They ask themselves the question of "can women and men be friends?" in the most intrestlingly way possible: by having copius amounts of sexual intercouse. The answer is, as always, what is your domestic box office gross gain? NO STRINGS ATTACHED, along with morals, candor and class! 

Dave calls upon one of his Mr. Writer Bombastic friends to redo our logo.  Noah talks about how he got his mom drunk once to design the original podcast logo.  And we all take a pause to recognize the incredible endeavors of Mark Rapacz. 

Fatty is now leaving Forks, Washington, population: zzz, zzz, zzz. The end of a saga is upon us as Dave and Noah are subjected to The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II, starring Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner and a breakfast burrito worth of CGI found in George Lucas' Roomba. K-Stew has a new attitude: she now sucks blood instead of screen time, but the salad days of her new marriage are over.  Her and R-Pat have been accused of committing the most heinous of all vampire crimes: upstaging Dakota Fanning with a younger, more cuter baby vampire who could give Honey Boo-Boo a run for her pharmaceutical grade Flintstone Vitamin Uppers. So once again every freak who could give a frack in Forks has to band together and help K-Stew and R-Pat go stand in a field to face off the Voltori, a supreme court team of Draculas from Italy. However, since this world lives and dies according to Stephenie Meyer's magical Mormon underwear, there are no outlandish rulings or even epic battles. People just stand and stare at each other, letting their thoughts do the heavy lifting. Just what this story needs...more staring! 

Dave tells his story of watching this movie in a discount theater full of Dakota Fannings. Noah brings up maple syrup and we all try to pretend that Jacob isn't really that into babies.

Noah attempts to survive the night in his haunted apartment.

When you get dumped, go get yourself a nice hot dish of Dunst.
2001’s Teen Rom-Com GET OVER IT starring Ben Foster, Kirsten Dunst, Colin Hanks, Martin Short and Sisqo. Yes, the one and only Sisqo of “Thong Song” fame.
Ben Foster’s first love has left him for the arms of a boy band poseur, who has the audacity to speak English the right way...with an english accent. When they try out for the school’s production of Midsummer Night’s Dream, high school jock Ben Foster puts down his basketball, puts on a leotard and turns to the smell of the greasepaint and the roar of the theater freaks for some cold comfort. His spirit is willing but his craft is weak.  Kirsten helps him out and, honest to Bard, they fall for each other. However, the course of true love never did run like a smoothie! Her older brother Collin Hanks is Ben’s best friend and Ben himself wins the role of his ex-girlfriend’s lover in the show.  Lawd, what fools these mortals be! It’s going to take a lot of sex clubs, dance sequences and parties where people puke in the punchbowl to help our Ben restore amends.  Just try and get over this, if you give a Puck!  

This isn't just a catchphrase from a Home Box Office situation comedy.  It's a full-fledged movie, missy!  In this episode, Dave is put to the test, Noah recounts the horrors of a surprise retirement party, and we all find out what it really means to "sell your soul to the devil of crappy". 

Thanks for listening!  

p.s.  Need advice?  Send your lovelorn queries to Noah at whenharrymetfatty@gmail.com  You'll be a star!