Wed, 25 January 2012
Double Double Toil and Trouble/ Like a hell broth boil and bubble/ In the poison’d entrails throw:
A show belov’d by history /And two stars who lack chemistry /Nicole Kidman who’s fair of mane
Will Ferrell with a shtick that’s lame / a remake within a remake /t’will only give you a headache
Nora Bore-ah Ephron wrote this / and should’ve toss‘d it in the abyss.
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Wed, 18 January 2012
Any Given Sunday, our Field of Dreams will Blindside our Hoosiers by showing us All The Right Moves…for We Are Marshall, and don’t you forget it! Mr. Destiny just got served in The Sandlot by one lean, mean Moneyball. If none of this makes sense, then you have just entered the void that occurs in Noah’s mind whenever he encounters sports. Welcome. Feel free to shake and lurch all over the church floor! 2005’s American remake of FEVER PITCH, starring Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore is finally a film that gives women all the baseball they so desperately crave in a rom com. Drew falls for Jimmy, but come spring finds out that his true mistress wears one heckuva loud red sock. When his passion runs red, and navy and white…how can their love survive before she retires to a league of her own?
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Thu, 12 January 2012
Hollywood if she could…get Universal Healthcare…from Universal Studios that is! This week we dig up a 1991 Country Time Lemonade classic starring Michael J. Fox and Julie Warner, (who can’t seem to find her bathing suit from time to time). MJF is on his way to Beverly Hills to be a plastic surgeon when he takes a detour that leads him directly to his true heart’s desire! Dave and Noah are still housesitting. Dave waxes poetic about his former country mouse ways. Noah reveals his secret language called Bumblef*ck, meant to be spoken only to his invisible twin…who died years ago under mysterious circumstances. Noah obsesses over a half-eaten titty cake that was left in a locker room. Dave talks Porsche engines and admits the real reason he no longer lives in a one-horse town.
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Thu, 5 January 2012
What do you get when you put Billy Crystal, John Cusack, Catherine Zeta Jones, Julia Roberts, Hank Azaria, Stanley Tucci, Seth Green, Rain Wilson, The Hyatt Hotel, A sixty pound fatsuit, a billowy poolside figure in white, Christopher Walken, a bunch of Hebrew-esque humor, press junkets and a terrible Spanish accent? Well…you get another reason to crack open that jug of Drano and call it a life. But before that happens, listen to your heart. Your so-sweet-its-pre-diabetic-heart. The year is still young, and this is America. America’s Sweethearts(2001), a movie about movies that centers around everything we don’t care about with movies: Press Junkets and publicity. Two publicists try to mend a broken relationship between two celebrities who used to give America a reason to believe in love. A sloppy love triangle ensues, replete with scrambled eggs being tossed into a lap. Spoiler! Dave and Noah steal a house. Podcasting from this venue inspires them to make a few resolutions. Dave raids the liquor cabinet and finds crappy snacks while Noah reveals a shameful, shameful secret. Noah eats a bag of nuts while Ollie looks on, his eyes dead, his mouth panting, his tongue yearning. Happy New year, and thanks for the listen!
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